Tuesday, September 30, 2008

5-4-T: Memorable Taxicab Conversations

As I was returning home from a bar, yammering with my roommate about things I'm sure our driver found wholly uninteresting, it got me thinking about the great taxicab scenes in the movies. So, today's Five-For-Tuesday runs down five truly memorable movie conversations that took place in cabs.

5) Pulp Fiction - "What does it feel like?"


4) Taxi Driver - "My wife is in there."


3) Breakfast at Tiffany's
Paul Varjak: You know what's wrong with you, Miss Whoever-you-are? You're chicken, you've got no guts. You're afraid to stick out your chin and say, "Okay, life's a fact, people do fall in love, people do belong to each other, because that's the only chance anybody's got for real happiness." You call yourself a free spirit, a "wild thing," and you're terrified somebody's gonna stick you in a cage. Well baby, you're already in that cage. You built it yourself. And it's not bounded in the west by Tulip, Texas, or in the east by Somali-land. It's wherever you go. Because no matter where you run, you just end up running into yourself.
[takes out the ring and throws it in Holly's lap]
Paul Varjak: Here. I've been carrying this thing around for months. I don't want it anymore.

2) Night On Earth - "Fresh hat!"


1) On the Waterfront - "Let's face it..."


What's your favorite Taxicab Conversation?

Monday, September 29, 2008

One Word Review: Wimbledon




66: Sporting

Friday, September 26, 2008

One Word Roundup

Where have all those One Word Reviews gone, you may be asking? The dishonest answer is that we lost them in the move. The honest answer is that they made the move but we haven't found the time to look them up. Shame on us. Anyway, we hereby pledge to get the OWR train chugging again next week. In the meantime, we thought it would be fun to take a look back at the 158 OWRs we've already posted. Remember that these ratings out of 100, but are not letter grades. If you're new to this, check out the criteria laid out in advance.

And rather than give them to you in chronological order (because movies are timeless, right?), we've organized them by the rating. Have at it, and leave comments about where you disagree.

Film Review Rating
Date Movie Worthless 16
Failure to Launch Stupid 19
Batman & Robin Vomit 20
27 Dresses Weak 21
Mrs. Henderson Presents Boobies 22
Shanghai Noon Inauthentic 26
My Best Friend's Wedding Foolish 28
Crash Inane 28
Penelope Sloppy 34
Party Monster Draggy 34
The Evil Dead Flimsy 34
Gladiator Banal 35
Cars Vacuous 35
Jesus Camp Condemny 38
Team America: World Police Spewey 38
Dogtown and Z-Boys Self-centered 39
Beer League Slutty 39
The Break-up Juvenile 39
Sarah Silverman: Jesus is Magic Schtuck 42
Transformers Blatant 42
Fever Pitch Whiffy 42
The Devil Wears Prada Skinny 46
The Simpsons Movie Gaggy 48
Die Hard With A Vengeance Ridiculous 48
Me and You and Everyone We Know Absurd 50
The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe Slippery 52
Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby Slow 52
Clerks II Chunky 52
Mean Girls Vapid 53
The Darjeeling Limited Sour 53
Eight Below Dorky 53
Water Low 53
In Good Company Gimmicky 54
March of the Penguins Vacant 54
I Am Legend Haphazard 55
The Squid and the Whale Conceited 55
Big Fish Corny 55
Bringing Up Baby Batty 57
Once Upon a Time in Mexico Stuffed 57
Nashville Tedius 59
American Hardcore Nostalgic 60
Cloverfield Blaring 61
Millions Squawky 61
School of Rock Aggressive-passive 61
Hot Fuzz Punchy 62
Ocean's Thirteen Winky 62
Click Cute 62
The Aviator Fluttered 63
The Kite Runner Plotty 63
The Host Scattered 63
The Proposition Tough 63
Death Proof Self-parodic 64
The Savages Shouty 64
Garden State Harebrained 64
North Country Heavy 64
Babel Rambled 64
Gone Baby Gone Episodic 65
Hero Vibrant 65
Mr. and Mrs. Smith Jolly 65
Napolean Dynamite Lucky 65
Idiocracy Jocose 65
Repo Man Pointy 66
Marathon Man Muddy 66
The Prestige Ostentatious 66
Ocean's Eleven Smooth 67
Michael Clayton Limpid 68
Million Dollar Baby Dubious 68
Hard Eight Soulled 70
Blood Diamond Schemey 70
Pan's Labyrinth Stormy 70
The King of Kong: A Fistfull of Quarters Square 71
Super Size Me Blithe 71
The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari Oblique 71
Thief Lonely 72
No End In Sight Damning 72
Syriana Recondite 72
Misery Maniacal 73
Superbad Rambunctious 73
Juno Inconsistent 73
300 Red-blooded 73
Lord of War Ambitious 73
Long Day's Journey Into Night Dark 73
The Assassination of Jesse James Deliberate 74
A History of Violence Indecisive 74
Sicko Illuminating 74
Bonnie and Clyde Gutsy 74
Capote Intimate 74
Broken Flowers Circumspect 74
Oldboy Alive 74
Half Nelson Lonesome 74
The Illusionist Extravagant 75
The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly Unabridged 75
V for Vendetta Amplified 76
Brick Loaded 76
Deathtrap Sly 76
United 93 Taut 76
Thank You For Smoking Slick 76
Standing in the Shadows of Motown Fond 77
Everyone Says I Love You Adorable 77
Eastern Promises Pinpoint 77
The Fountain Challenging 77
Match Point Crafty 77
Bring Me the Head of Alfredo Garcia Explosive 77
Three Kings Shrewd 78
Black Snake Moan Robust 78
The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou Self-indulgent 78
Casino Royale Manic-depressive 78
Good Night, and Good Luck. Lucid 79
Being There Fragrant 79
An Inconvenient Truth Cogent 79
In Bruges Patient 80
Lost In America Jaunty 80
Knocked Up Jocund 81
Sanjuro Playful 81
Murderball Muscular 81
Grizzly Man Obsessive 81
The Queen Deft 81
Away From Her Dour 82
49 Up Merited 82
Static Spooky 82
The Warriors Digable 82
Before the Devil Knows You're Dead Overwrought 83
The Barbarian Invasions Remissive 83
Little Miss Sunshine Winning 83
The Dark Knight Sensational 84
The Killing Fields Demanding 84
No Country for Old Men Muted 84
In the Heat of the Night Striking 84
For A Few Dollars More Sudden 84
Sin City Colorful 84
Adaptation. Clever 84
The 40 Year Old Virgin Eruptive 84
Touching the Void Gripping 84
The Departed Tensey 84
Collateral Sleek 86
Miller's Crossing Smart 86
I Know I'm Not Alone Welcome 86
Amelie Darling 86
Zodiac Meticulous 87
Once Upon a Time in America Rich 87
Cinema Paradiso Bellissimo 87
O Brother, Were Art Thou? Bonafide 87
The Fog of War Potent 88
Children of Men Captivating 88
Casablanca Proud 89
Borat: Cultural Learnings… Outrageous 89
Smiles of a Summer Night Sparkling 89
Ratatouille Delectable 90
Running on Empty Honest 90
American Splendor Exceptional 90
Fight Club Provoking 91
Rushmore Sincere 92
There Will Be Blood Ruthless 93
Hoop Dreams Phenomenal 94
Network Profound 96
Pulp Fiction Respectful 99
Dr. Strangelove Marvelous 99
Chinatown Wistful 100

Thursday, September 25, 2008

Thursday Youtube


and

If you don't find these as hilarious as I do, I feel sorry for you.

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Unyielding Commissioning is Perturbed

See You at the Party Richter - Over at The Movie Blog, they've posted their "10 Most Talentless People In Movies." According to them, the #1 least talented person in Hollywood is... Arnold Schwarzenegger. Well, you can imagine how I reacted to such a thing. I originally posted the following comment:

How can you put Schwarzenegger on this list at all, let alone in the top spot? Arnold's popularity never stemmed from his muscles. The guy's talented. Having him included corrupts your whole list. Having him number one makes you a rabble-rousing punk.
But minutes later, the comment had disappeared. Perhaps I went too far? Let me know what you think. I really like The Movie Blog. They are truly devoted to film and to blogging and deserve what they've achieved. They work hard. But to put Schwarzenegger above the likes of Paris Hilton, Jessica Simpson, and Dane Cook? Please. If you personally don't like Schwarzenegger or his movies, fine, but there's a reason that every film he's been in makes piles and piles of money, winning over millions of fans while The Hottie and the Nottie is the IMDb's 15th worst movie of all time and grossed $27,696. If you really believe that Arnold has less talent than these people, then you're less of a movie fan than I thought. And if you are doing this just to ruffle feathers and garner comments, then you're being dishonest and are worse bloggers than I thought. I don't know what to think, actually.

I discussed the Arnold mystique a bit when I set up the Schwarzenegger Sunday feature. And in reviewing the majority of his leading roles last year, I discovered he was even more gifted than I believed. I find myself offended at this point, and not just because of the time I put in. It feels like someone has just told me that Sarah Palin will be a good president because she can see Russia from her home state.

I doubt my comment was intentionally removed from their site, but if it was, that would be an act of cowardice. Given some of the others that remain, and the fact that they generally seem to let the complaints fly most of the time, I have to imagine it was simply a technical error. But I'm annoyed at the list anyway. I've lost a little respect for the guys. It pains me to say that.

The Latest Top Ten

I often link to Scene Stealers Tuesday Top Ten. Well, I'm linking again today. However, you have extra incentive to read the list, cause this one was written by me. So head on over to check out my Top Ten Unfairly Maligned Sequels.

54T - White Dudes Who Hired Chicks Who Can Wail

It's high time for a new feature 'round these parts. Until further notice (i.e. when I change my mind), we're going to be doing a Tuesday Five-fer. Each Tuesday, we'll throw out a unifying theme and the top five examples we can think of. Today, five British acts who hired some women who can really wail and made it work. Not much commentary needed on this one, but plenty of Youtubes to go around.

5) Spiritualized - Come Together (The London Community Gospel Choir)
4) Basement Jaxx - Good Luck (Lisa Kekaula)
3) Joe Cocker - With a Little Help from My Friends: (Madeline Bell, Sunny Weetman, and Rossetta Hightower)
2) Pink Floyd - The Great Gig in the Sky (Clare Torry)
1) The Rolling Stones - Gimme Shelter (Merry Clayton)

So tell me, which ones did I forget?

Monday, September 22, 2008

Wow

Sir Ben Kinglsey impersonating Ian McKaye. And why not?

Sir Ben Kingsley STOMPS into the shoes of Minor Threat's Ian MacKaye from Mean Magazine on Vimeo.
(HT /film)

Friday, September 19, 2008

Unyielding Commissioning Hopes He's On Cloud Nine

Love Don't Live Here Anymore - It seems like we've been linking to obituaries more and more lately. Legendary producer and songwriter Norman Whitfield has passed away at the age of 68. That man who wrote many of The Temptations greatest accomplishments, not to mention Marvin Gaye, Gladys Knight & The Pips, and many other Motown acts. From my earliest interest in soul, his work has been at the forefront of my experience. Check out Dan's excellent obit, and if you have the time, the Allmusic Guide biography is worth reading.

Please celebrate the man by listening to Rose Royce's "Keep On Keepin' On", just one of his indelible contributions to the soul of America.


Free Stuff! - Well, not exactly stuff, but Scene Stealers is reporting that you can now watch oodles of movies on the IMDb for free. That's, um, like worth doing and stuff.

Wax On, Wax On - I'm not sure what's up with Roger Ebert lately, but he's really opening up on his blog. A few months ago, he opined on the movie of his life. Then, just a few days ago, it was an explanation of his ratings. Now he's discussing the role of the critic. This one's a pretty interesting read. But I wonder why he's getting so philosophical lately. Either he's contemplating retirement, or he's simply hitting his stride as a blogger.

Crom Laughs At Your Four Winds - Coming on the heels of the news that McG is directing the fourth Terminator installment, The Movie Blog is reporting that Brett Ratner is helming the remake of Conan The Barbarian. Ratner, known best for his three Rush Hour pictures along with the last of the X-Men films, has never shown the ability set up a reality in the way that John Milius did so masterfully in the original Conan. Now, if we have to compare the two appointments, there's no question that the odds of Ratner putting together something interesting are significantly higher than McG putting out something remotely passable. McG suuuuucks. Still, this hiring does nothing to get me more excited about a project I assumed was doomed from the start. As one of the TMB commenters said, they should be making the King Conan feature with Arnold reprising his role. Maybe once he's done while the whole governor thing.

Here There Be Tygers! (just click on it - not as scary as the a usual "tygers")

Thursday, September 18, 2008

Heard These Guys Yet? - Sept 08

We're back with another healthy dose of recommendations! Take your medicine:

Recommender: Biz
Band: Dianogah
Blurb: Sticking with what I know... another Chicago band! Although named after the trash compactor creature on the Death Star, Dianogah's sound is not garbage. In the past Dianogah has been a 3-piece featuring 2 bass players and drums in a mostly instrumental format. I have always liked the 2-bass sound, and Dianogah delivers it with deep grooves of interest. For their latest album released last month, Qhnnnl, their first in about 6 years, they have brought in many special guests, including vocalists and an occasional guitarist. It also features the always amazing Andrew Bird on violin on many tracks. Dianogah also appeared as Bird's backing band, as they do in this recent video for Lull. Bassist Jay Ryan is a man of many skills, probably better known as a talented poster artist. In fact, it is likely you've seen his silkscreen prints used in poster and album artwork for your favorite bands. Just like in Jay's artwork, you can hear lots of squirrels in the Dianogah sound... if you listen carefully! Even with the more diverse instrumentation, the new album still features lots of cool bass sounds. I think Qhnnni is an exciting direction for the band, and I hope we can hear them collaborate with Mr. Bird more in the future, as they have expressive, yet complementary styles.
Reminds me of: A bass-heavy more fun version of Tortoise
File Under: Diggin' for the Disco Dump
But don't take my word for it: Dianogah at Myspace

Recommender: PMaz
Band: Blitzen Trapper
Blurb:If you like bands that have a consistent sound, then you are not going to like Blitzen Trapper. My first introduction to them was the title track off their latest album, “Wild Mountain Nation”. “Sounds a bit like Wilco…back when they were good”, I thought to myself. But songs like “Devil’s A Go-Go” combine the recklessness of Stephen Malkmus & the Jicks with the blues rock crunch of The White Stripes. And the playfully warped “Woof & Warp of the Quiet Giant’s Hem” (who named this song…Robert Pollard?) is in a league all its own, probably belonging on a Flaming Lips album. Speaking of Robert Pollard, BT is a bit “lo-fi”, and their songs rarely extend beyond the 3-minute mark for those of us with short attention spans. I hear a bit of a Beck influence in here as well, though Beck is quite the chameleon in his own right. The synthesis of all of these sounds comes together best in a song like “Murder Babe”, a piece of power pop/prog rock bliss. It’s doubtful you are going to hear anyone say, “Hey, I heard this new band and they sound a lot like Blitzen Trapper!” And that’s a good thing.
Reminds me of: The Flaming Lips covering the Grateful Dead
File Under: Son of Son Volt
But don't take my word for it: Blitzen Trapper at Myspace

Recommender: Jonas
Band: Fujiya & Miyagi
Blurb: I first stumbled upon Britain ’s Fujiya & Miyagi in 2007 while sitting at my computer listening to a radio stream from Seattle . I realized my head was bobbing up and down and determined that I needed to hear more. The album was Transparent Things, and I fell in love with it and them during the first listen. That’s rare for me, it usually takes 5 or 6 listens of an album to come to a conclusion like that. I would best describe the band as “indie electronic” because they really do an impressive job of balancing both synths and guitars throughout their albums. A good baseline is always present and can at times give songs a funk or almost disco feel. The electronics really come out on their instrumental tracks, and the beats per minute ramp up in these as well. The music is simple and is well done, and it wouldn't hold up as well as it does without the lyrical aspect. Their lyrics are always simplistic and quirky, but sung softly in a serious manner as to personalize their purposefully weightless subject matter. And what I mean by weightless subject matter is that in the songs “Reeboks in Heaven” or “Sucker Punch”, that is indeed what the songs are about. Nothing more. I highly recommend Transparent Things, and they have just recently release their follow-up to that, Lightbulbs. I am new to the latter, but I’m already pretty sure I’ll enjoy it just as much since it doesn’t stray far from the groovy, indie, electronic pop that got me hooked in the first place.
Reminds me of: A bit of The Beta Band with more energy and less attitude + a Casio keyboard from 1983.
File Under: Domo Arigato, light on the throttle
But don't take my word for it: F & J at Myspace

Recommender: Kyle
Band: Lykke Li
Blurb: After the initial shock of being freaked out slightly by her Little Bit music video wore off, I gave this gal a chance and she won me over. This Swedish tart has spacier vocals than most of her female pop counterparts. On a personal note, I absolutely love the mandolin in "Little Bit." Produced by the Bjorn from Peter Bjorn & John, every member of the band appears on the record for at least one song. This swedish tart has spacier vocals than most of her female pop counterparts. Even though it feels like she's sneaking around away from the microphone, she's not afraid to sex things up just a bit.
Reminds me of: Feist + Peter Bjorn and John
File Under: Makeout Music on Mars
But don't take my word for it: Lykke Li at Myspace

Recommender: Reed
Band: The Most Serene Republic
Blurb: I can't imagine a band with a name that's harder to remember. It has taken me two months of rote practice to get it straight. But all that effort has been worth it. I first heard of these guys when they crammed all 46 members (an exaggeration) onto a tiny stage at this summer's Wicker Park fest. Their band-geek appearance didn't exactly inspire confidence in their ability to rawk out. But from the get-go, their bright, high-energy indie rock wowed everyone in attendance. Their latest release, Population, features their strongest collection of tracks, but all three albums are worth checking out. Unfortunately, they're not on tour now, but the next time they roll through town, you'll need to see them live and in person, just for the sake of observing the sweet precision.
Reminds me of: The Harlem Shakes meets Broken Social Scene
File Under: Canadian Jumping Beans
But don't take my word for it: TMSR at Myspace